Wasn't Me

If one takes a look at some of the photographs included within this little blog right now, then one will discover a certain startling fact. Well, perhaps I am being presumptuous, but none the less, they all have one thing in common, and it is something which they should not have.

The glorious and humble sugar bowl; but bare.

Aside from the 'glorious' sugar bowl, which appears to be a standard tradition at retreat centres all over that I have been to. No, not the fact that they have sugar bowls, or similar dispensers, but what they are made from. There seems to be a 'need' to demonstrate the 'willingness' to recycle or reuse, or maybe something along those lines. It cannot be due to cost, since even an average sugar bowl, or similarly suitable glass or plastic receptacle is not that expensive. I have been to many retreat centres, and almost across the board they have this 'need' to use empty peanut butter, or margarine, or yoghurt containers as sugar bowls. At times they will even use them for the salt and pepper, as well as tea, coffee, biscuits or rusks, etc. though that is not as common as the humble sugar bowl.

Not another drop will spill.

There is of course, strictly speaking, nothing wrong with that either. I personally have not found that my tea is in any way tainted by the sugar having come out of an erstwhile peanut butter jar, or that it has in any other way inconvenienced me. Yet, there is none the less one aspect that surrounds or affects this humble receptacle which has on many occasions inconvenienced me. No, I am not even referring to the fact that people have a need to stick their own wet spoons into the bowl, causing lumps to be formed, and at the same time on occasion in the process also introducing all sorts of other oddments into the sugar. That is disgusting, to say the least, but that is also not what I am now referring to. What I am mentioning also affects other aspects within the confines and amenities of retreat centres, or in fact any place of communal existence. All are aspects by which most, if not all, people are affected.

It seems that there is a familiar phenomenon among humans, and that is no matter what happens or what the situation is, it was never anybody. Regardless of where, when, or what, nobody did it. Though this occurs everywhere in everyday life, I tend to become so much more aware of it while on retreat, but then also when one is living within confined quarters, with a limited or finite number of other people. It is only obvious that if a certain situation presents itself, which should not be, or which is not expected, than somebody must have been involved in or with it, or else somebody who should have been part of it, was not.

Oh woe is me, to rush in an see ...

There can be countless examples of this, but the more obvious, and to a certain extend I find more startling ones, are when something is finished. As in “empty”! Perhaps the reason why I find this so startling or even irritating, is that it happens seldom, if ever, that something is just suddenly finished. Invariably there are ‘tell-tale’ signs that it is going to be finished soon. So why is it then so difficult to make provision to ensure it can be easily replenished? Even more so when usually there is somewhere plenty of stock available. Take sugar, salt, dishwashing liquid, or toilet paper, it is something which in a centre is invariably bought in bulk, and hence there is a 10kg bag of sugar, 5 litre bottle of dishwashing liquid, pack of 48 rolls toilet paper, and so on. There is not a shortage as such. To make matters worse, invariably this supply is usually within maybe ten metres of where it is required, so there is not a long distance to walk to get it. Yet, it seems even those ten metres are too far and exhausting for most people.

No joie de vivre.

I even experience on a regular basis that people will use the gas kettle on the stove to fill the electric kettle, when the electricity comes on, because it is within reach, rather than to have to walk two meters to the tap to fill the electric kettle there. Now is this the height of laziness, ignorance, stupidity? What, if anything, useful goes on in a human’s brain to have them do that? Matters are compounded when one considers that this is happening in a place where people are apparently doing self-development. According to most forms or traditions of spiritual practise, and this includes self-development, one should at all times, if prudent, not choose the path most commonly or usually taken. That means one should challenge or test one self, in order to not choose the easy way out. Initially this may seem silly or even ridiculous to most folks, but it is all a matter of what ultimately becomes habit. But perhaps more about that another time?

Hollow and empty to the core.

In addition to that one should at all times endeavour to practise mindfulness. That means being aware of what one does, as one does it, and then also applying some common sense or logic, as most will not yet have sufficiently developed an iota or semblance of any wisdom. According to this is should be obvious that if one is now being too lazy, or not wanting to be inconvenienced, that just means that somebody else definitely will be inconvenienced. On occasion I have even completely filled the oven kettle, so that when I walk in later on I just need to put on the burner and it can start heating up, only to find it is empty. Surely when one encounters a full oven kettle, one asks one self whether somebody perhaps did that intentionally. Or not? It can hardly be coincidence that the kettle would be totally full for no apparent reason. And if you do not want to be inconvenienced by refilling the sugar bowl, or replacing the toilet paper, putting out a new tin of milk or jar of jam, then that just means somebody else will have to. Either that, or it becomes a matter of seeing who can hold out the longest. Though in some instances that is not only not practical, but it may even mean that somebody could be seriously compromised. Like with the toilet paper - I am confident I do not need to go into any degree of detail.

The whole ‘saga’ becomes even more interesting when one then confronts the others, whether individually or as a group, and raises the question as to who last used that particular item, there will be the well-known reply “wasn’t me!”. No matter what it is that is finished, it got finished all by its lonesome self. Simple.

Have to have at least two or three boxes
open at the same time, just in case.
Just in case ...

There are of course also variations on this theme, like having the need to open whatever new container or jar there is, regardless of whether there is already an open one. And also the practise of not opening the box or packet neatly, so it can be easily resealed ensuring that the contents keep relatively fresh as long as possible, or at the very least that unwelcome insects and the likes are kept out, but the box or packet has to be savaged open. Why finish off one container before opening the next, when you can have four or five all open at the same time. Be it jam, milk, tea, bread, cereals, no matter what it is, always ensure that you open a new container. That is just the way it is. And leading on from that, what I had touched on earlier on already, the practise of introducing your own utensils into whatever container it is that you are taking something out of. I think I would be correct in saying that the two objects most commonly afflicted by this practise are the sugar bowl, and the butter or margarine container.

Why only open one jar, when you
can open twoor even three of the
same jam or marmalade at the same time?

Let’s face it, nothing is more inviting then to see clumps or lumps of sugar, knowing full well how they were created or what caused them. Or to try and find a spot on the butter which is not infested with some other ingredient, like jam, humus, peanut butter, breadcrumbs, bits of fruit, muesli, coffee, you name it, I am sure I have seen it on or among the butter or margarine at one time or another, or even more often than not. The reason for this is quite likely unfathomable. People will not go along with me saying it is because the persons using before you were too lazy, nor will people like it if I ‘accuse’ them of not caring. I could ascribe it to a lack of mindfulness, which definitely is part of the problem, but that is not the ultimate cause, reason, or justification. So why do people do some of the aforementioned things that they do? Is it because we are not really cultured and civilised at all, but in actual fact closer to animals than what we would like to believe and admit? I am confident that some of the readers will be most put out by my even hinting at this, but why else do people do, or not do, some of the things that they do. To me it certainly indicates a basic lack of consideration for others.

Usually there are far more open milk cartons, but I
obviously took the photo at an inopportune time. ;-)

If I, though, take the phenomenon of leaving dirty dishes standing around, then I would have to go along with laziness. And the same also for not properly washed dishes and cutlery. Just plain simple laziness. Surely there cannot be anybody out there who seriously believes the plates, as well as knives, forks and spoons, and mugs, will wash themself? On occasion it may certainly appear to be like that, because when one walks in on a dirty lunch or tea room scene later on it is all neat and tidy. But in actual fact it is just that somebody could not take the mess any longer and cleaned it, or else they may have needed some cutlery or crockery them self and were thus forced to have to clean it, or make do with dirty stuff, or just to without it altogether. Just as with the empty containers, if one asks who left the dirty plate, or messy counter top, or who did not wash their mug, the unanimous reply will be “wasn’t me”!

!O-3|-W;-